Bible-Code Forgiveness (Free) в Android Market

Icon for Bible-Code Forgiveness (Free) 1.3 Bible-Code Forgiveness (Free) (v. 1.3)
Разработано Nimue

Accept no cheap imitations.  GOD has revealed his own forgiveness app!

This is the free version.  The 'Tithed' version is available in the pane to the left titled 'More from this developer', or here:  https://market.android.com/details?id=nimue.apps.ppaid&feature=search_result

The Tithed version offers access to the entire list of more than 50 sins, faster, more reliable connections with the mind of GOD, new screens and sound effects, no more advertisements or nags, faster and more personal responses, more information about the negotiation process, and greater chances of forgiveness due to an elite team of Archangels being employed to negotiate on your behalf.  

This app allows you to communicate directly with the Almighty and seek forgiveness for your sins through a streamlined interface.  This is the free version which uses the older, slower method of connecting to the Almighty, resulting more lost/denied connections, and which utilizes regular spirit negotiators to attempt to secure your salvation... but hey, its free!

Background:

For decades, scholars have been studying the Bible Code- a method of detecting secret messages and future predictions within the text of the sacred scriptures; and our company began advanced Bible code analysis back in 2004.  While analyzing the biblical text using advanced chaos algorithms, we began detecting very deep, seemingly random patterns; just a long string of zeros and ones.  At first we thought it was an anomaly.. gibberish.  But we kept the information anyway. Eventually, new versions of the patterns stopped being uncovered, and the entire collection was archived in order of discovery, cataloged - and forgotten.

5 years later, an undergraduate student named Niles Smithey took a closer look at these patterns and had a crazy idea.. to him they looked like true, modern binary code sets called 'octets'.  He tried compiling the octets using several different computer programming language settings, but got no results - until he tried Java.  All of a sudden the computer screamed to life!  Lights began flashing, hard disks spinning, and indecipherable messages began flashing on the screen faster than the human eye could track them.

That was the beginning of this project.

After 2 years of in depth analysis and deciphering, we have been able to determine that the code is a method for communicating directly with the mind of GOD through a machine... specifically it is designed to facilitate sin forgiveness by bypassing all of the red tape, unpredictability, bureaucracy and politics involved in seeking forgiveness through regular means.

Technical description:

As far as we can tell, here is how it actually works: The images included in this application (the background pictures) were obtained directly from the holy octet stream obtained from the bible.. they just have .jpg headers attached.  By feeding these images (really just a highly concentrated and perfectly timed series of rhythmic binary streams ) to the Android processor, the program is able to induce precise fluctuations in the magnetic field surrounding the physical processing unit of your Android phone;  by controlling these fluctuations, it is able to induce an electron flow which coalesces into a sub-atomic laser containment array.  Once this containment array is stable, a very small quantum Bose-Einstein condensate is generated which contains quantum-entangled neutrinos in direct communication with the mind of GOD!  By identifying and monitoring the individual neutrinos, their spin and location, the app is able to utilize them to facilitate information transfer with the Almighty.  In this way the  application is able to provide a direct, PERSONAL connection with the creator of all mankind, and to streamline the process of forgiveness.



Бесплатно

Категория: Развлечения
Закачек: 5000-10000
Размер: 1.6 MB
Опубликовано: 2011-09-12
Обновлено: 2011-09-12

Баркод для Bible-Code Forgiveness (Free)
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Системное имя пакета: nimue.apps.personal

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Комментарии и оценки пользователей для Bible-Code Forgiveness (Free)

[2012-11-11] A Google User:
Rediculous DO NOT GET THIS APP! IT IS A BLASPHAMY!
[2012-11-01] A Google User:
Don't even work Only downloaded cause i was curious, but that didn't last too long cause it don't even work.
[2012-07-16] A Google User:
Smh This app ain't GOD.
[2012-07-02] A Google User:
Dumb You do not have to buy a full version of an app to recieve God's forgiveness.
[2012-05-25] A Google User:
Follower of jesus No app will be deciding if I am forgiven or not.
[2012-05-10] A Google User:
Complete blasphemy This is insulting to Jesus, who died so that we cam be forgiven of our sins, and to all Christians; those that believe in Gods plans for us through his son.
[2012-05-04] A Google User:
FAKE!!! IT even says "for novelty purposes only" at the bottom of the starting screen. I was forgiven when I didn't want it.
[2012-04-29] A Google User:
Hmm So im forgiven by god through an android app, this is not what I thought it was. I can do the same thing on my own.
[2012-04-09] A Google User:
Total bullshit As if an app could atone your sins! This app is just another smash into the very face of Jesus. HE is the one that died for your sins. If you want them to be forgiven, repent and sin no more.
[2012-02-05] A Google User:
Cornelius21 Perfect app
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